I wish I could get rich making junk like this

I've been going through some of my old computer files, trying to figure out what I can delete.  It's been quite a walk through memory lane.  One of the things I found was the set of "flair" buttons I made.

Allow me to explain.

A couple years ago on Facebook, there was this thing called "Flair", where you designed your own buttons with weird sayings on them.  I don't know if it exists anymore, but I thought that just for fun, I'd let you see some of the buttons I made.

Semi-meaningless picture I made while in a lousy mood on Monday night

Slurp

Here's a screencap of my desktop for no reason.
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Dona Nobis Pacem

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December 5 update: Due to the daily amount of spam I've been getting on this post, I've had to disable the comments. I'd been trying to wait until Mimi could swing by and leave her comment, but the spam has gotten out of hand. My apologies for any inconvenience this causes any of you "real" commenters out there. :(
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Three years? Already?

Today is my three-year blogiversary. (Jannaversary?)
Yay.
Everybody have some cake or pie or salad or tacos or falafel... or whatever else floats your boat.
If blog years are like dog years, this means mine is finally old enough to drink.
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Pines and Roses

The Manic Monday theme is "pines", and I couldn't think of anything to say about it, so I made a picture instead.
Try drinking a gallon of a highly-caffeinated beverage before you look at it; that'll help it seem a little more exciting.

If that doesn't help, try reading this stupid joke first, then the picture will seem genius-like in comparison:
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Q: What did the Icelandic nuclear physicist cow say to the Danish architect cow?
A: Moo.
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Just a picture...

I made this yesterday, during a moment of insomnia, tea-saturation, and hopeful creativity.
It'll be my Facebook picture for awhile.
Now if you'll pardon me, I'm craving peanut butter cookies and I simply MUST go find some.

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You can almost smell the fertilizer....

Since I can't actually keep plants or flowers alive in person, I might as well just photoshop myself with them instead. I made a floral banner (without the faces) too.
Can you find all five Jannas in this picture?

This almost makes me look cheerful.
(Note to self: Be extra curmudgeonly tomorrow.)
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Next week I'll try taco sauce instead

As some of my friends will tell you, I have a tendency to keep things in my bra.
More than the usual two things, I mean.
If you read Jantics awhile back, you know how I woke up with a ketchup packet poking my boob.
It happened again, sort of.
I had another ketchup packet in my bra.
Actually I had more than one. (The exact amount is classified)

One afternoon, while in the middle of the grocery store, I felt one slip over to a VERY uncomfortable spot and poke me in a rather undesirable place with those jagged ketchup-packet edges.

I wanted SO BAD to just reach right in there and scratch where it itched, and move stuff around, but in such a public place I felt somewhat stifled. Instead, I awkwardly shoved the side of my arm against the offending area, hoping to herd the packets closer to the center valley of bra-land.

This happened repeatedly.

No doubt I appeared to be having some sort of seizure.
I could have just found an empty aisle, pulled discreetly over to the side, and THEN reached in and rooted around. But then someone could have walked by and seen me. Surely they'd have thought I was trying to steal something.
I would have been mortified, being left with no choice but to flash the stranger by lifting up my shirt and emphatically showing them that there was nothing in my bra but two boobs, a cell phone, and some ketchup.

Then they would probably nod quietly and back away slowly.

Before long, there would be cautionary posters in the store's entryway, warning customers to stay away from the weird bra lady who talks to iced tea in the parking lot.
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I made the following picture, which seems to correspond nicely with this post...
You may have seen it on Facebook's "Owned" application. I uploaded it there because I wanted to see if anyone would bid on it. :)

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Manic Monday: Egg

There were all kinds of things I could have done for today's theme.
I could've shown you a duck egg with a tail on it, or some strange kind of egg-bologna.
Over at Jantrails I show some neat eggshell carvings, and on Jantics I show the abomination known as Bacon-And-Egg Ice Cream.


I could also point out that if Humpty Dumpty and the Monopoly guy ever have a love child, it would look like this:


But instead I think I'll just make a list of
Things That Do NOT Belong In An Omelet:

1. Metal Shavings
2. Hand Sanitizer
3. Curtains
4. Murder Weapons
5. Post-Nasal Drip
6. A Black Hole
7. Suntan Lotion
8. Starfish
9. Sperm Donations
10. Bunny Fur
11. My tonsils
12. Extension Cords
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Oh, and here are two Janna-heads on an egg.
No reason.
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Manic Monday: Can

Manic Monday: Two

I have a lot on my mind today. I'm waiting for some important test results, and the concept of "humor" feels a little foreign to me.
You realize, of course, this means all I have left is the "strange" factor.

Today's theme is "two."
We have two eyes.
Well, most of us do, anyway.
So I made two pictures, just for the occasion.


If you'd rather see something more traditional, you can go to Jantrails, where I rant about typos.
And then, over at Jantics, I... well, I clearly have nothing useful to say. But go ahead and visit anyway.
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Manic Monday: Blue

I love it when the MM theme is a color, because it inspires me to make pictures.
Today's theme is blue.
I love blue. I also love leaves. So, today's pictures involve the two together.

I also made a banner out of one of them:
(click to see full size).

If you're disappointed because you were expecting to read something humorous today, you can always click over to my Manic Monday post at Jantics. And if you're completely stressed out, click over to Jantrails.
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The changing of the banners.... again

As you can see, I've changed my banner again.
Since I have so much fun making graphics, I change my banner often.
Sometimes I change it multiple times per week.
The previous one was really up for quite awhile, compared to usual.
If you despise this new one, just wait. It'll be gone eventually.
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Manic Monday: Orange

I love it when the Manic Monday theme is a color, because it inspires me to make pictures.

Other people invent stunning technology, cure diseases, discover ancient artifacts, and build rockets that go to the moon..... I make pretty pictures.
It's ok. I'm not bitter.

Feel free to use any of these on your own blogs, if you'd like. Just mention me and/or my Jannagraphics site somewhere in the post, please!

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By the way, if you like these, part of the thanks goes to Morgen, because it was his idea. He thought it would be fun to have some autumn-themed Manic Monday banners, so he e-mailed me and asked if I could make some.
Morgen is chock-full of good ideas. :)
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Manic Monday: Lie

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Manic Monday: Green

The Manic Monday theme is "Green", so I made some pictures for the occasion.

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I enjoy making pictures like these.
In fact, I love it. It's very cathartic.

It would be nice if I could make a living from it.

Blog banners, buttons, altered graphics, backgrounds, computer wallpaper, e-mail stationery.... I can do this, people. I've been doing it for years. I was doing this even before I got into blogging. Now that I'm part of the blogosphere, it comes in handy because I make all my own blog banners and backgrounds. It's frustrating when I see other people making a living doing something I would LOVE to be doing. I feel like a mom-and-pop business which is being drowned out by Wal-Mart.

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UPDATE: Here's the URL to my graphics site!!!! :)
http://jannagraphics.blogspot.com/

Continuum... continuum... continuum....

That sound you heard this evening was a hole being ripped in the space-time continuum as I co-hosted Pointless Drivel Live on BlogTalkRadio with the one and only Mr. Fabulous.
Be afraid.
No, really, go ahead, be afraid. I can wait a few minutes.... I'll just sit here and repeat the word "continuum" to myself over and over, 'cuz it's fun to say.
(pause)... continuum continuum continuum continuum continuum continuum ....
...Thank you.
Well, those of you who tuned in heard what my voice sounds like, as well as what I sound like when I am having a nervous breakdown.
I am accepting all donations of Xanax and Klonopin and Ativan (no suppositories, please), as well as suggestions on what liquor would be best to mix with them.

Update: I have finally talked myself into listening to the archived show. It took a lot of courage to click on that "Play" button. And, to my relief, I discovered that maybe I didn't sound as bad as I thought I did. :)
Maybe the universe can continue on after all.
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Picture I made today while in a really bad mood

Manic Monday: Yellow

Morgen has decided that today's Manic Monday theme is YELLOW.
Because I've been in a photoshoppy mood all week, I decided to make some pictures that have a lot of yellow in them.