Saturday, August 8, 2009

The Embarrassing Bratwurst Incident of 2009

The most embarrassing thing in the world just happened.
Well, maybe the second most embarrassing thing.
I haven't decided yet.

I spent the day at home, lounging around, reading, napping, web-surfing, and whatever else I could think of to make this feel like a Saturday.
I didn't get dressed because I hadn't planned on leaving the house.

In the evening, I decided to make some bratwurst.
Yummy bratwurst with honey mustard, so plump they squirt when you bite into them.

Well, in the middle of my meal I heard a knock at the door.
%$#&@!!!, I thought, since I wasn't dressed appropriately enough to welcome any visitors.

I ended up hurrying to throw on a simple full-length sleeveless cotton dress. It covered everything that needed covering, despite the fact that I didn't have time to put on any bra or undies. My hair was a mess, and I hadn't showered yet, either.

I got to the door just in time to see two guys walking away.
Turns out they wanted to know if my neighbor's truck was for sale.

While I stood there in the doorway talking to them, Brynden scooted out the door, and I had to bend over and pick him up.
Yikes, I thought, hoping my bralessness was not becoming immediately evident.

The two guys were polite enough, though they sure seemed to ask a lot of questions I had no answer to. (Seriously, how would I know anything about my neighbor's truck?)

After they left, I happened to glance at my face in the mirror.

And I just about died.

All that time, there was this huge splurt of honey-mustard-and-bratwurst-juice on my left cheek.

Just thick enough so that it remained stuck in mid-drip.
I have no idea why I didn't notice it before!!

I can only imagine what the two guys thought.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go crawl under a rock until the year 2018.


Da Old Man said...

Pretty embarassing.

But why would they ask about your neighbor's truck? That is weird. Maybe they were up to no good, and you scared them and saved the neighborhood.
Honey mustard and bratwurst juice may have been your best defense.

Anonymous said...

Ah...never mind. In any case I'd check for any signage on that truck( maybe a drawn arrow pointing to your place for inquiry? ). I took a look at an old van yesterday and took a good guess to which apartment it belonged to( out of a three unit building ). But this was done late morning and no mustard was present-LOL!

Jeff said...

I'm stuck on the fact that you lounge around, make food, eat and web surf naked.

btw... you up for a web chat?

Anonymous said...

It never dawned on me, until I read Jeff's comment, that you might be lounging around all day nekkid. I used to do that in my younger days, before gravity did me in. My brother quickly learned never to use his key when visiting.

Janna said...

DaOldMan: At least I gave them something to blog about, right?

Subtorp: There is no sign on the truck at all. Honestly, I don't think it's for sale.

Jeff: Hey! I didn't say naked; I said "inappropriately dressed for visitors"...
(**looks around nervously**)

Grace: Trust me, gravity hates me too.

Jeff said...

"I didn't get dressed because I hadn't planned on leaving the house."


"...despite the fact that I didn't have time to put on any bra or undies."

If that's not naked I don't know what is. Perhaps you need a lawyer.

Janna said...

Jeff: *gulp* I... uh... I....

Anonymous said...