Monday, March 21, 2011

At least the word "squint" is fun to say over and over again

You might remember the post I did back in 2009, where I learned I needed bifocals.
(Or, if your memory is like mine, you probably don't. It's ok. I won't tell anyone.)

Anyway, a few days ago, my glasses broke.
Specifically, the frames broke. (Not the lenses.) So I took them to the optometrist's office today, in hopes that something could be done to fix them.

I worried I might need an entirely new pair of bifocals (about $500.00), or an entirely new pair of frames (around $180.00). I am nowhere near rich enough to afford either of those options, so naturally I was filled with dread.

The good news is that since they're metal frames, they can be soldered. The office will send them to the manufacturer, who will solder them for twenty five bucks.

If they were bulky plastic frames, I'd probably just try something cheap and tacky like a dab of super glue.

Mine look remarkably like the picture here:
The metal part is very thin, and it doesn't even extend over the bottom part of the lenses.

It seemed wise to trust them to a professional.

Sooooo, in the meantime, I'm wearing my previous pair as spares. (You can sort of see them in my blog banner at the top of the page.)

They make faraway things perfectly clear, but because my eyes are so much worse now, they make it impossible to read anything close up.
My eyes become scrambled eggs. (And not even the good kind of scrambled eggs with cheese and bacon and sausage wrapped in a warm tortilla with salsa.)

To read things now, I have to take my spare glasses off and hold the page embarrassingly close to my face.

Over the weekend I needed to read a lot, and it was a big challenge because I kept having to put glasses on every time I needed to see far away, and kept having to take them off every time I needed to read something. All day long, it was put on, take off, put on, take off.

Sort of like Mr. Potato Head, but not exactly.

Anyway, now's the time to trick me into signing any illegal contracts or fraudulent life insurance policies. I'll probably just squint and sigh and scribble my name in the general direction of wherever you're pointing.

My bifocals will be fixed in about a week and a half, so you have enough time to think of something.


Crazy Mommy said...

I love the pictures in your blog-they are awesomely appropriate and hilarious. AND you totally gave me an idea for my next blog post!

Janna said...

CrazyMommy: Your next blog post will be about breakfast burritos filled with diced pieces of Mr. Potato Head?

Anonymous said...

I could never get used to bifocals - I kept falling down stairs - Since I don't really need glasses to read all that much I stick with just the distance glasses but yes, it is annoying to have to take them off when I want to read something but not as annoying as falling down stairs all the time would be.

Crazy Mommy said...

Haha no. It will be about the time I thought I didn't need glasses and mistook a fire hydrant for a large jungle cat.

Janna said...

Grace: But what if the sign you can't read says "Be careful, there are a bunch of stairs up ahead!"...?

CrazyMommy: Ah! I see. Sort of. (!!!)

nonamedufus said...

When I first had to get glasses it was because my arms weren't long enough. I couldn't hold the TV Guide far enough away to bring it into focus.

Janna said...

nonamedufus: I bet you could have rigged something up with a clothespin, a broomstick, and some duct tape.