Tuesday, July 27, 2010

If summertime must include heat, at least let it come in Dorito form

There's a new flavor-trio of Doritos which claims to be hot.
As you know, I consider this sort of thing a challenge, since the VAST majority of such claims end up being nothing more than hot air from a bunch of pansies.
I like HOT spicy things-- the hotter the better.

The new Doritos come in three varieties, all of which are named after various levels of burns:
1. "1st Degree Burn: Blazin' Jalapeno"
2. "2nd Degree Burn: Fiery Buffalo"
3. "3rd Degree Burn: Scorchin' Habanero"

Unfortunately, my local store didn't have anything hotter than the 2nd degree version, so I bought a little 99-cent package of those.

They're ok.
Not mild, and not entirely wussy. Sort of medium, almost with an edge that might vaguely approach the "hot" realm during its afternoon fantasies when it daydreams of being all grown up.

Not bad.
Still, I wish it was hotter, which is why I'm trying to find a store that sells the "3rd Degree Burn" variety.
I'll let you know if I can find it.

Here's a video of some 12 year old kid trying to eat a whole bag of them in under 5 minutes.


MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

Personally, I'm waiting for Doritos: Surface of the Sun. I figure that flavor might approximate a roasted poblano or jalapeno pepper, which we regularly get to eat here in Colorado. You'd love it here, Janna, because we have great Mexican food made by actual Mexicans, who know what it's supposed to taste like. I've been up in your part of the country, and spicy means they keep an honorary jalapeno pepper on a shelf in the kitchen, and simply pass the meals past it on their way out to the tables. Pathetic.

Subby said...

I tried the 3rd degree burn 1st...meh...after that I didn't see a reason to try the others. There was a flavour carried exclusively by Commie-Mart...er Wal-Mart a couple years back called "Fiery Habanero"...I'm always bugging a vendor to bring those back...SIZZZZZLE!

Janna said...

MikeWJ: I agree completely. Our state is full of wimpy pathetic people who are sometimes afraid of even using the pepper shaker along with the salt. Very sad.

Subby: Awww. See, I tried the "Fiery Habanero" ones awhile back. I was disappointed. I wanted them to be hotter. Please, PLEASE tell me the 3rd degree chips are hotter than those. Should I get my hopes up?

Subby said...

Janna, don't bother with them (unless you're packin' some of the KICK ASS hot sauce. ) I liked the fiery ones 'cause they had a pretty good flavour to go along wi' th' heat.

A co-worker brought in some sauce claiming it to be the hottest on th' planet...hot? yes; taste? hurl!

Now if Frito Lay came out wi' say...45th degree burn, I might be more inclined to try those.

Dinna let th' flames on th' bag fool ya!

Janna said...

Subby: It seems to be a recurring theme that "flames on the bag" mean it's actually very, very wimpy.
People are wusses.

Subby said...

Janna, I hear ya. The "El Diablo" Doritos were a joke. Forget that there was a devil on the bag and flames...! I've gotten more heat from "Atomic Fireballs"( candy )!