What I SHOULD have said....
Something interesting happened Friday night.
It all started on my way back from a late-night Taco Bell craving.
This was about 2:00 in the morning, on one of the many back roads in Michigan, out in the middle of nowhere. Up ahead of me, I saw strange blinking lights off to the side of the road. At first I thought it was someone's odd idea of Christmas lights, or maybe some of those blinking light thingies that the road construction people put up when we have to avoid a section of the road.
But, as I got closer, I saw that it was a car which had gotten into an accident.
They were facing into the ditch, perpendicular to the road, nose-downward at nearly a 45-degree angle. The blinking lights I saw were their hazard lights.
Yikes, I thought.
Unsure of what to expect, I decided to stop and see if they needed my help.
I parked on the opposite side of the road and got out.
"Hi..." I heard someone say.
It was coming from inside the car. Sounded like a a teenage girl. Early 20's at the oldest. It was so dark out; I couldn't see what they looked like or if they were ok.
"Are you ok?" I asked.
"Yeah.... we swerved to avoid a deer, and spun out into the ditch."
"Do you need me to call 911?" I offered, holding up my phone.
"No, that's ok. My dad is on the way."
They seemed calm enough about everything, so I left them. Unsure of what to say before leaving, I ended up saying something pretty stupid.
"Well, good luck," I said hopefully, with as much soothing optimism as possible.
Really. What a stupid thing to say.
Kinda late for "good luck," wasn't it?
I wish I could've hit the rewind button and said something that wasn't quite as dumb.
Possibilities:
1) "Well, I'm glad you're ok."
2) "I hope everything turns out all right."
3) "Watch out for the big hairy madman that prowls this area in the middle of the night and occasionally turns into a vampire zombie werewolf. He usually gets hungry around 2:00."
4) "Tell your dad he still owes me twenty bucks."
5) "I'm the lawyer for the deer you almost hit. We'll see you in court."
.
13 comments:
I just think you caught them in the act of ditching the car.
don'tcha just hate that? I think #3 is hilarious
Yep... #3 is the one you should have used.
If it was dad's car they will need all the good luck they can get. You said the right thing.
I like the lawyer one.
Or
"Hi. I just got in this body a few minutes ago. I had to get my bearings for human life and wade through this very strange brain and get the hang of speech. But I think I have it now. I'm the soul of the deer you just hit. Yeah, tell yourself you swerved to miss me all you want, but here I am, a displaced animal mind stuck in this very hungry body. I'm pretty sure normal etiquette dictates that you treat me to a Taco Bell meal. I can eat anything but venison."
Taco Bell? Didya get the bacon cheddar chalupa thingy?
Bear: LOL. I'll always wonder. :)
Dizzblnd: It would've been even funnier if I could've faked a Transylvania accent.
Jen: Hee! Probably!
Whall: I wonder if the North Pole Taco Bell serves venison...
Travis: Yes! As a matter of fact, I did! :) I'll be blogging about it next week, too!
Marilyn: If only I could go back in time... actually there are a LOT of things I would do if I could go back in time.
#3... I didn't know you lived near Avitable. Small world, huh?
I wish you said #3 and #5. Or combined them.
Gwen: Scary, isn't it?
Lynda: If I was really on top of things, I could maybe find a way to combine all five.
Terrifying.
Gwen: Maybe garlic will keep him away. I think I have some in my back seat.
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