Monday, December 3, 2007

Manic Monday: Ship

For the next three weeks, I will be offering to ship any one of the following items to you, absolutely free:

Cat hair
Dryer lint
Tissue which has been in my bra all day long
Piece of Taco Bell wrapper, cut into a heart shape
Used kitty litter
Post-it-note with meaningless gibberish written on it
Two squares of fresh new toilet paper

Make sure I have your address.
Order now, quantities are limited!
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Also, I would just like to say that if I ever get a spaceship of my very own, I hope that somewhere on board is a combination CD-player and cheese grater.
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Manic Monday on my other blogs:
Jantics: Poem about catalog shopping
Jantrails: My ancestor the pirate
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24 comments:

Angry said...

Cat Hair? No thanks, got a cat.
Dryer Lint? I prefer Drier Lint.
Tissue..? We call that 'padding' over here.
Taco Bell wrapper..? I'll swap for a 'Where's Wally' sticker.
Used Kitty Litter? No never, I'm afraid I might get grit in it.
Meaningless gibberish..? Is there such a thing as 'meaningful gibberish'?
Fresh new toilet paper..? What's the alternative?

On reflection, but with much thanks anyway, I think I'll pass on this one.

tegdirb92 said...

all wonderful stocking stuffers!! Have a great Monday.

Villager said...

Great MM Post! Hmmmm... I think that I'll pass on the offer this time around...

My MM post this week involves cruising on the high seas.

peace, Villager

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

hey i always have a tissue in my bra too! what's up with that? anyway if you get a big rush on those and run out, let me know. i can help! ha ha

smiles, bee

Jamie said...

Such a generous offer, but how could I deprive you of such phenominal treasures.

Mo said...

I was basically going to say the same thing as Jamie - how could I possibly ask for any of your treasures and deprive you of their, um, warmth?
If you get a run on used kitty litter, and need more, I can help you out there. Just tell me where to send the dump truck.

Matt-Man said...

I'll take the tissue. I could use some after thinking about your bra. Cheers!!

Janna said...

Angry:
1. Lucky you!
2. No, here it's "dryer lint."
3. And yet I'm willing to give some away for the betterment of humankind.
4. Here we call him "Waldo".
5. It's always a shame when grit gets in the kitty litter.
6. Actually, I like to think of this blog as "meaningful gibberish." Kind of the opposite of Pointless Drivel.
7. Obviously the opposite would be for me to send you USED toilet paper.

Tegdirb: Are you sure you don't want any of them?

Villager: Aw, c'mon, they're FREE!

Bee: Hey, we have something in common!

Jamie: It's ok; I don't mind sharing.

Morgen: My own dump truck is still full, but thanks for offering!

Matt-man: How romantic!

Dont make me get out my flying Monkeys! said...

Your blog is in ship shape! Come aboard my ship over on my blog!

Marilyn said...

You know how some men are about bra-filling. Be careful with that...

Great deals all around there. I'll keep them in mind.

Janna said...

Monkeys: Wow, deja vu...

Marilyn: It's ok; I'm desperate for attention.

whall said...

Can we partake a la carte, or is it a package deal?

Janna said...

Whall: Feel free to pick and choose the items that interest you the most.

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

How clever of you. Think you'll get any orders? Bwahahahah. Have a great MM. :)

Janna said...

Sandee: I'm hoping I get at least ONE order... surely someone out there has a pressing need for one of these items...?

Crazy Working Mom said...

Amazing...what I need to know is can you wrap them up before you ship them so that I can have them shipped directly to my loved ones? ;)

Happy MM!

Chelle B. said...

I'm more into bartering, so for the cat hair can I trade you a slightly used kitten who likes to eat the bulbs off the lower branches of my Christmas tree?

And for the dryer lint, I'd gladly trade you for a basket of laundry that went undone today?

Hmm..as for the rest, I'll look around and see what other fair trades I may have, k? :)

Chelle B.
The Offended Blogger

Travis said...

Anything you've kept in your bra is of interest.

Well, almost anything.

Just to be clear...would there be any Taco Bell leftovers on the wrapper? Like some melty cheese perhaps?

Wayne said...

I'll take the meaningless gibberish! Oh! and the tp! I never have enough of that!
I love free!

Steven said...

Hmmm. Amazingly, I just restocked on everything on your list. No need to ship me anything at this time. But thanks for the offer. You kindness and willingness to share continues to overwhelm me.

Janna said...

Chelle: Sure. I'm a sucker for slightly-used kittens. I'll have to look at the laundry first, but I'm definitely interested if it has a lot of bath towels. I need some more bath towels.

Travis: Send me your address and I'll send you a tissue which has been in my bra all day long. As for the Taco Bell wrappers, they would probably be void of any food residue. Sorry if that's a deal-breaker.

Wayne: Ok! I'll have it in the mail tomorrow!

Steve: Hey, anything for my loyal readers.

Janna said...

CrazyWorkingMom: Hmmmm... let me consider this....

Mr. Fabulous said...

I'll take some of each. You have the address.

Awesome!

Janna said...

Mr. Fab: Excellent!