Thursday, September 27, 2007

Thank goodness for stain-resistant car seats

Somewhere in the world is a guy named Joe, who is currently driving 78mph on the Interstate. Joe had two bran muffins for breakfast because the doctor said to get more fiber. He also drank an entire pot of coffee, because, let's face it, Joe loves coffee.
Joe now has to pee really bad, and the gurgling in his gut suggests something else might be happening down there as well.
The nearest rest area is at least 20 miles away, and the kids in the back seat just started singing "One Hundred Bottles Of Beer On The Wall" for the 32nd time so far that day.
Unbeknownst to Joe, his car will soon hit a deer about five miles up the road, at which point he will no longer need to use the restroom.
Aren't you glad you're not Joe?

Unless, of course, your name really IS Joe, in which case you might want to slow down a little.
And cut back on the coffee.

11 comments:

Mr. Fabulous said...

Joe is an asshole.

Robin said...

Joe is a loser.

Janna said...

Mr. Fab: Clearly you are jealous of his superior sexual prowess.

Robin: Is it National "Let's-Copy-Fab" Day?

metalmom said...

Holy shit! I mean crap! I mean...I'll shut up now and thank Jeebus I'm not Joe!

Mo said...

"cut back on the coffee" does not compute...

Mindy said...

I guess his mother will be ashamed of the state his underwear will be in! Unless he goes commando.

Angry said...

I'm more glad that I'm not the car seat... or the deer... or Joe's kids for that matter.

Janna said...

Metalmom: Remember this post when Thanksgiving rolls around.

Morgen: It's a tough concept to grasp at first.

Mindy: Either way, the car seat is in trouble.

Angry: I know! I feel bad for the deer.

cardiogirl said...

It sounds like the universe is going to give Joe what he deserves.

katherine. said...

never buy used cars....

Janna said...

Cardiogirl: Poor Joe!

Katherine: Or at least sniff the seat beforehand, just to be sure.