Whatever you do, don't look down!

Weird thing which happened today:
I was all depressed about my washing machine breaking down, and spent the day in my bathrobe, blog-surfing and web-surfing and eating cheap microwaved burritos which made me fart like a big ol' diesel truck that's stuck in front of you at the longest red light in history...
But I digress.
Anyway, I was marinating in my bathrobe, which snaps shut in front. Beneath that I had a long-sleeved sweatshirt, to help keep me warm. I hadn't showered yet and smelled pretty ripe, if I do say so myself.
Suddenly I heard someone walking on the front porch... and then a knock at the front door.
This alarmed me because
(A) I NEVER have visitors; I'm kinda weird that way. I just have a real hang-up about letting people into my home. I never, ever have guests. Ever.
(B) As you can probably surmise from the previous description, I wasn't exactly in picture-perfect shape for any type of human interaction.
Nonetheless, I got up to answer the door, and saw a young guy standing there. He looked like he was in his very early twenties. He plopped a bottle of laundry detergent into my hands and asked if he could come in to do a "demonstration."
I shook my head and laughed. "My washing machine broke a couple days ago.... I swear to God."
Undaunted, he offered a different proposition. "Well, then, how about a different demonstration. Do you need a vacuum sweeper that does everything?"
That's when I remembered, to my chagrin, that my vacuum had ALSO broken down awhile back. (Crap! What is it with all my stuff breaking these days???)
Still not thrilled with the idea of letting a stranger into my home, I politely declined, telling him I was going to get a new vacuum from my Mom in just a couple days.
Slightly saddened, he gave up and asked for his bottle of laundry detergent back.
I told him I hoped he had better luck at the next house. (Though for all I know, he was some nut who used the 'demonstrations' as an excuse to get in people's houses and kill them and steal their stuff.... good thing all my stuff is broken, huh?)
After I shut the door and re-locked it, I realized something.
My bathrobe wasn't snapped shut all the way down.... barely past waist level....
And I wasn't wearing underwear.
Oops.
(Janna pauses while all of you try to get that mental image out of your heads)
(Bwa-ha-haaaa, you can't, can you??)
Hopefully he didn't notice.