Saturday, January 27, 2007

Whatever you do, don't look down!

Weird thing which happened today:
I was all depressed about my washing machine breaking down, and spent the day in my bathrobe, blog-surfing and web-surfing and eating cheap microwaved burritos which made me fart like a big ol' diesel truck that's stuck in front of you at the longest red light in history...
But I digress.
Anyway, I was marinating in my bathrobe, which snaps shut in front. Beneath that I had a long-sleeved sweatshirt, to help keep me warm. I hadn't showered yet and smelled pretty ripe, if I do say so myself.
Suddenly I heard someone walking on the front porch... and then a knock at the front door.
This alarmed me because
(A) I NEVER have visitors; I'm kinda weird that way. I just have a real hang-up about letting people into my home. I never, ever have guests. Ever.
(B) As you can probably surmise from the previous description, I wasn't exactly in picture-perfect shape for any type of human interaction.
Nonetheless, I got up to answer the door, and saw a young guy standing there. He looked like he was in his very early twenties. He plopped a bottle of laundry detergent into my hands and asked if he could come in to do a "demonstration."
I shook my head and laughed. "My washing machine broke a couple days ago.... I swear to God."
Undaunted, he offered a different proposition. "Well, then, how about a different demonstration. Do you need a vacuum sweeper that does everything?"
That's when I remembered, to my chagrin, that my vacuum had ALSO broken down awhile back. (Crap! What is it with all my stuff breaking these days???)
Still not thrilled with the idea of letting a stranger into my home, I politely declined, telling him I was going to get a new vacuum from my Mom in just a couple days.
Slightly saddened, he gave up and asked for his bottle of laundry detergent back.
I told him I hoped he had better luck at the next house. (Though for all I know, he was some nut who used the 'demonstrations' as an excuse to get in people's houses and kill them and steal their stuff.... good thing all my stuff is broken, huh?)
After I shut the door and re-locked it, I realized something.
My bathrobe wasn't snapped shut all the way down.... barely past waist level....
And I wasn't wearing underwear.
Oops.
(Janna pauses while all of you try to get that mental image out of your heads)
(Bwa-ha-haaaa, you can't, can you??)
Hopefully he didn't notice.

13 comments:

julie said...

Oh my! Travis WAS right! I didn't really doubt him though. Some good stuff here dear. I'll be back soon.

Travis said...

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaha

Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

Bond said...

Hi Janna... we have been circling each other , around Mos and othe places. Of course I see your Carnival banners all around. And I look to see two of my good friends also visit you here...Julie and Travis..

Funny story...

Cheesy said...

OMG girl... you past of a free housecleaning?? CHIT!

Steven said...

Remind me to tell you the story about me falling out of an airplane bathroom...with my pants in my hands!

By the way, I changed my blog address to: http://www.livinglifeaware.blogspot.com/ I haven't added anything in a while, so don't expect anything new. :-)

Always on the Move said...

OMG, I think I'd want to die...but then again, I think I'd just laugh and laugh and laugh. That was a great story. I love your blog, and I'm sure you'll see me around more commenting on here!!!! Your life sounds way too exciting!
Hope things go better for you this week!

Morgen said...

Hello -
I know I've already covered this in an e-mail to you but: I love this story! It is classic Janna.
Shame you didn't get to keep the little bottle of laundry soap, though.
Next time, have him put his soap in the (broken) machine and try to do a load of laundry. When it doesn't work, turn to him and DEMAND that his company fix your washing machine. "I mean, it WORKED FINE before I put YOUR product in, mister!" You coulda had your washer fixed, but NO -- you just flashed him instead!
:)
xoxox
mo

amisare waswerebeen said...

I doubt that he didn't notice unless you were hiding behind the door. No worries. Once when I was still breastfeeding my daughter, I answered the door and didn't realize that one side of my shirt was still up over my boob. If anything, at least he was a little entertained. :)

Steven Novak said...

Somethign similar to this has happened ot me on more than one oaccasion...

I bet I have less people over to my house than you... ;)

Steve~

Peanut said...

OMG! now I have a really bad mental image....

Kyle said...

I love it! he should feel privaledged to bear witness to such an amazing individual. Though I've never had that particular incident happen to me..if it had, I'd tell EVERYONE lol. Hey..whatever gets me free cable right? :-P see ya tomorrow!

Runamok said...

Imagine what he wrote in his blog...

Natalie said...

HI-larious. I never answr my doorunless I am expecting someone. Sometimes that upsets peopel who think dropping by is ok and normal.