Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Beware of soy in cheese clothing

Today I tried soy cheese for the first time ever.
I'm hoping it was also my last time ever.

I tried three different kinds: "mozzarella" flavor, "pepperjack" flavor, and "smoked provolone" flavor.

It tasted like cheese in much the same way that doormats taste like steak.

It dawned on me that it would technically be possible for someone to eat a soy burger with soy cheese on a soy flour bun.
I don't want to know if there's such a thing as soy ketchup and soy mustard.

My advice is just to eat sensible amounts of real cheese and real cows.  It tastes better, it's cheaper, and you won't have to spend ten awkward minutes trying to get the taste out of your mouth.

4 comments:

ShellyS said...

A vegetarian friend of mine once swore that soyburgers taste like hamburgers so she cooked one for me. The first bite was pretty good. The second bite, not so much. The third bite made me want to barf. There was no fourth bite.

Janna said...

Shelly: The veggie burgers themselves I actually like. I've tried both kinds; there's the kind that pretends to look like hamburger, and the kind that doesn't bother pretending. Morningstar Farms "Grillers" is an example of the first type; Mornngstar Farms "Garden Veggie Patties" is an example of the second. I prefer the Garden Veggie Patties, but there are both kinds in my freezer right now. As well as regular meat that once lived and breathed. I'm an omnivore. :)

nonamedufus said...

Oh man, I think you better gargle with soy mouth wash and brush your teeth with soy toothpaste to get rid of the taste. Oh, wait a minute...

Janna said...

nonamedufus: Please, please tell me those items don't really exist...