Thursday, July 16, 2009

Thirteen things no one has said to me so far this year

1. "Is that aluminum foil in your bra?"
2. "I wish they made enchilada-scented hand sanitizer."
3. "There's a tarantula on your leg."
4. "You look so intelligent when your sinuses are congested."
5. "Please don't tease the watermelon."
6. "I wish your blog was all about politics."
7. "That wedge of pizza you just ate was shaped just like South Carolina."
8. "Wow, you really DO have some Grey Poupon!"
9. "Please stop drawing cartoons of yourself in the parking lot at midnight."
10. "Have you ever tried deep-fried goldfish on toothpicks?"
11. "We should start serving Rocky Mountain Oysters in school cafeterias."
12. "I'll pay you ten thousand dollars to dye your hair blue."
13. "I'm wearing three socks right now."


Mr. Condescending said...

ohhhh I LOVE Grey Poupon! I miss those commercials soo much!

Wavemancali said...

Ok I must admit a morbid curiosity about your responses to 1 and 5 had they been asked of you.

Anonymous said...

Well then just consider yourself lucky...

Anonymous said...

Don't need to hit the link for the Rocky Mountain Oysters. Pop told me about that years ago( PUKE! ) 'course, he was the one that also ate cow tongue, when he was a kid( triple GAG!!! )

Oh and by the way Janna, does your chewing gum lose its flavour on the bedpost, overnight?( apologies to Lonnie Donegan )...

whall said...

Hey, if this isn't politics, I don't know what is.

Janna said...

Mr.Condescending: My favorite Grey Poupon commercial is the one with the squeeze bottle. (The one I linked to). It still cracks me up. :)

#1) No; I'm just feeling extra shiny today. (On both sides!)
#5) It's ok; I'm not laughing AT the watermelon; I'm laughing WITH the watermelon.

Grace: I do!

Subtorp77: Ack! Cow tongue is yet another one of those "things" that people really, really, really shouldn't eat. Ack. (!!!)

Whall: No! Say it isn't so!

Da Old Man said...

Deep fried goldfish. They are crunchy, and not really fishy if they are fresh. You should try them.

Brooklyn Girl! said...

LOL - I lived in colorado for a couple of years and they tried to pass orr "prairie oysters" as meatballs to me..I said those are meatballs but not the kinda meat I eat! lol!

Janna said...

DaOldMan: Yaaaay! Welcome back! :)

BrooklynGirl: Ack! Guess we can both be thankful that Thriftway doesn't sell those, huh?