That sound you're hearing is my sugar buzz... or maybe the TV... or... look, a bird!!

Want people to drink some weird mysterious concoction you just invented? Stick it in a can and put the Pepsi logo on it! Make sure it's cold! People will buy it in six packs and 24 packs and... do they make 48 and 64 packs, or am I thinking of crayons?

As I mentioned earlier in the week, I tried that new "Pepsi Throwback" stuff. The idea behind it is that it uses real genuine sugar (like it had back in the old days) instead of HCFS (high fructose corn syrup).
I guess I never realized there was a taste difference between the two sweeteners, but there IS.
The "real" sugar in the Throwback version tastes cleaner and less syrupy, less overwhelming.
I recommend it for any of you sodaphiles out there.
Now that I've tried it and liked it, the old HFCS version just tastes kinda nasty, like bug guts that have been simmering in a pot of honey mixed with sunscreen.

Usually I don't drink much soda anyway; I'm still hooked on tea.
I hear there's a new brand of tea called "Swiss Premium", or something like that, which uses real sugar instead of HFCS. I'm looking forward to trying it. Eventually it'd be nice if I could learn to like unsweetened tea, so I can avoid that whole calorie/sugar/guilt thing altogether. But in the meantime, meh.

In a few minutes, I plan to try the Mountain Dew Throwback, just so I can start the weekend on a caffeine surge.

Bizarre thought: I once had lavender flavored ice cream. And it really wasn't bad at all. I wonder what lavender flavored coke/pepsi would taste like.
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Better start filling up the pool

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If I can't be loved, at least let my bra be filled with taco sauce

In case you're ever on Jeopardy, or playing Trivial Pursuit, and you need to know what Janna had for dinner on Valentines Day 2009, the answer is nachos.

If this knowledge results in cash prizes, I fully expect a percentage.

On a semi-unrelated note, I just realized I have two packets of taco sauce left in my bra, and the corners are making me itch.
Please excuse me for a moment.
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Ahh. Much better.

As I was saying, I have survived my least favorite day of the year, and am looking forward to just about ANY other day that does not involve pink and red hearts and couples hand-in-hand, oozing romance in a way that is eerily reminiscent of a seeping pustule.

On the bright side, there will be a lot of heart-shaped chocolates marked down to bargain price tomorrow.

Ten Other Things The Letters VD Could Stand For:

1. Vampire Dyslexia
2. Velvety Droppings
3. Virginia's Dirty
4. Virtual Donkey
5. Voluptuous Donuts
6. Veal's Delicious
7. Viciously Decapitated
8. Vermin Delight
9. Vaseline's Disgusting
10. Vintage Delusions
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Did you miss me?

(Just say yes. Lie if you have to.)

I've been in an awful mood this week.
I've been sick, plus my great-aunt died, plus I had my heart re-broken again. (Insert bitterness and misery and disbelief and various other synonyms here).

I plan to remedy this by taking lots of vitamin C, spending more time with my surviving relatives, and never, ever, ever, ever falling in love with anyone in the universe ever, ever again.
So far, the plan has worked well.

Just call me Janna the eunuch. (Jannuch?)

To make up for being gone since Monday, I'm going to post the following potpourri of things:

First, I'd like to draw your attention to this strangely disturbing picture. Let me know what you think. It kinda reminds me of a cross between JarJar Binks, a litter of puppies, and some lady I saw at the store last Sunday.

Second, I'd like to say that Calvin & Hobbes was one of the best cartoons ever. I like this one, even though it's not particularly funny, because it's something I've actually done before. (When I'm not dreaming of Carrot Top, that is.)

Next, I think this sums up my thoughts on french fries.

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And, if you need something to go along with your french fries, you can always try this:

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Something to maybe possibly avoid

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Sedimentary legume hockey with frosting

It's about two in the morning and I JUST got back from ABC group.
My brain is fried from an overdose of yummy pasta alfredo, plus there was a lengthy conversation about computer stuff which I barely understood. I have perfected the art of staring off into the distance while remembering to blink occasionally.
I can barely string together coherent words into sentences, and I have to get up for work in less than six hours.
Electric squash temple. Mellifluous sidewinder packet. Light amphibian jockstrap sale.
Here... maybe I should just post a picture.
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Manic Monday: Juice

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And then, sometimes it IS....

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I will never be the strangest person on the planet

Yesterday was Michael Jackson's birthday. He is 50 now.
I used to be a fan, when I was a teenager back in the 80's. I owned the "Beat It" album. (This was the closest I ever came to being "cool." I'll pause for a moment while you all reflect on how truly sad that is.)
Since then, the world has been watching in fascination as he has become stranger and stranger. I love being seen as "just a little bizarre", but ol' Mikey has clearly shown me that there are some levels even I cannot attain.
Would any of you would like to burn the image of MY face into your toast?
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Party on, Mr. Jackson.
We're all wondering what you could possibly do next.
I'll be watching and taking notes.
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Janku 7

(Don't know what a Janku is? Click here.)

-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-
I'm still on hold
Waiting for humans
Customer service? Ha ha!
-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-
If you go
Outside naked
The neighbors like staring
-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-
A taco burp
Full of hot sauce
Is much worse after midnight
-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-
Fish eyeballs
Are terribly slippery.
Don't chew them; just spit them out.
-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-'-=-

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For Morgen

Maybe this is what I heard in the forest last week...
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Would the toes be chewy or crunchy?

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Have a good weekend

I may not be online for much of the weekend, so I'm counting on all of you to be really sad and forlorn about my absence. Start practicing dejected facial expressions now and avoid the rush.

In the meantime, go try this Visual DNA thingy.
I'm hoping that by clicking HERE, you can see my test results.
If not, let me know, and I'll go shout at the the computer screen or curl up in a corner somewhere. That sometimes works.

Oh, and before I go, here's one more thing I did, just for you.

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Thinking Quietly

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