Super Janna

I just got a SPAM message in my e-mail with the following subject:
"Activate super-human abilities without effort: new technology!"
This made the following thoughts come to mind:1) Without effort? Cool! It's about time they did something for all the lazy superheroes out there! How many times have I been near a bus teetering off the edge of a cliff, only to shrug and walk away muttering "Ehh. Too much work."
2) What superhuman abilities would I like to have? Here is a list of what I think might come in handy.
.....a) Flying: This would come in quite handy when gas prices are high, although lately it's been so COLD that any flying would likely result in a lazy frozen superhero crashing abruptly to the ground and shattering into icy chunks.
.....b) Climate control: Finally, a way to keep a bubble of 60-70 degree air around me at all times. No more sweating in summer or shivering in winter. And then I could create a perpetual cloud of 90 degree air around George Bush, so he'd say "Huhhh, hey, Laura, maybe those god-hating liberals ARE right about global warming after all..."
.....c) Shapeshifting: At last, a way to be a size 4, overnight! Pass me the designer stuff! Pass me a whole bunch of money to PAY for the designer stuff!
.....d) Animal communication: So when my cats say "meow", I will know if they mean "Hello," or "Pet me," or "Feed me immediately," or "You jerk, there are four turds in my litter box and I want them gone NOW."

Wordless Wednesday

My pants are a pineapple-free zone

Since I forgot to do a Thursday Thirteen last week, let's do a "Tuesday Twelve" today instead.
TWELVE THINGS I'M GLAD I DON'T HAVE IN MY PANTS RIGHT NOW:
1) A pineapple
2) Poison Ivy
3) Tom Cruise
4) Yogurt
5) Ice cubes
6) Porcupine
7) Molten Lava
8) Aquarium gravel
9) George Bush
10) Shredded Wheat
11) Cactus
12) Atomic Bomb (ask me again after the next burrito)

Manic Monday #1: Cruising

Welcome to the first edition of Manic Monday.

Click here to read Morgen's explanation of the whole thing.
As you can see, today's theme is "Cruising."
My first reaction, when I read that, was "HUH???"
I wondered what the heck I could possibly say about "cruising", since I've never been on a cruise, nor have I ever owned a car of sufficient "coolness" factor to really cruise in. I've never cruised the streets/bars for dates, and I haven't been in a police cruiser.

(Yes, I know, I've led an incredibly dull life. Cry for me later.)

But I was eventually able to come up with a few tidbits about "cruising" which actually applied to me, sorta. Rather than just choosing one, I figured I'll just plop them all in there like a big ol' can of Alpo into the cyber-dog-dish.

Enjoy.

TEN THINGS I WOULD HOPE TO SEE AT THE MIDNIGHT BUFFET ON A CRUISE SHIP:
1) Fettucine Alfredo
2) Beef Stroganoff
3) Mini Egg Rolls
4) Stuffed Flounder
5) Stuffed Mushrooms
6) Italian Sausage & Rigatoni
7) BBQ Ribs
8) Raspberry Tarts
9) Dark Chocolate Torte
10) Black Forest Cheesecake

TEN PLACES I WOULD CRUISE TO IF I HAD AN UNLIMITED SUPPLY OF MONEY, GAS, AND TIME: (And someone else to do the actual driving, so I wouldn't need to worry about getting lost alone:)
1) Mackinac Bridge (Michigan)
2) South Haven (Michigan)
3) Los Angeles, CA (to visit Steve and attend a taping of Craig Ferguson's show)
4) Anyplace in Canada (Eh?)
5) Chicago (to shop at the Levenger store and visit the museums)
6) Florida (so I could see a real live alligator in its "natural habitat"... LOL)
7) New York (to attend a taping of David Letterman's show)
8) Maine (just because I've never been there... and I hear that's where Stephen King lives. :)
9) Cambridge, MA (to visit Harvard square and the "Car Talk" garage)
10) Seattle, WA (Frasier used to work there, and the space needle thingy looks cool).

THREE THINGS I FIND ANNOYING ABOUT TOM CRUISE:
1) He is completely tone-deaf and can not sing on-key. (Anyone who's seen Top Gun has ample evidence of this.)
2) The whole "jumping on Oprah's couch" thing.
3) His judgmental negative viewpoints on antidepressants (and other prescriptions), and his self-righteous conviction that he knows best. (Evidence: the Matt Lauer Today Show interview, talking about Brooke Shields).
....By the way, did we ever actually get to see clear photographic evidence that his kid is real?? Or just a plastic doll-- ("New Barbie: The Suri Edition! Comes with a B-list of celebrities and a tiny couch to jump on, just like Daddy!")

Whatever you do, don't look down!

Weird thing which happened today:
I was all depressed about my washing machine breaking down, and spent the day in my bathrobe, blog-surfing and web-surfing and eating cheap microwaved burritos which made me fart like a big ol' diesel truck that's stuck in front of you at the longest red light in history...
But I digress.
Anyway, I was marinating in my bathrobe, which snaps shut in front. Beneath that I had a long-sleeved sweatshirt, to help keep me warm. I hadn't showered yet and smelled pretty ripe, if I do say so myself.
Suddenly I heard someone walking on the front porch... and then a knock at the front door.
This alarmed me because
(A) I NEVER have visitors; I'm kinda weird that way. I just have a real hang-up about letting people into my home. I never, ever have guests. Ever.
(B) As you can probably surmise from the previous description, I wasn't exactly in picture-perfect shape for any type of human interaction.
Nonetheless, I got up to answer the door, and saw a young guy standing there. He looked like he was in his very early twenties. He plopped a bottle of laundry detergent into my hands and asked if he could come in to do a "demonstration."
I shook my head and laughed. "My washing machine broke a couple days ago.... I swear to God."
Undaunted, he offered a different proposition. "Well, then, how about a different demonstration. Do you need a vacuum sweeper that does everything?"
That's when I remembered, to my chagrin, that my vacuum had ALSO broken down awhile back. (Crap! What is it with all my stuff breaking these days???)
Still not thrilled with the idea of letting a stranger into my home, I politely declined, telling him I was going to get a new vacuum from my Mom in just a couple days.
Slightly saddened, he gave up and asked for his bottle of laundry detergent back.
I told him I hoped he had better luck at the next house. (Though for all I know, he was some nut who used the 'demonstrations' as an excuse to get in people's houses and kill them and steal their stuff.... good thing all my stuff is broken, huh?)
After I shut the door and re-locked it, I realized something.
My bathrobe wasn't snapped shut all the way down.... barely past waist level....
And I wasn't wearing underwear.
Oops.
(Janna pauses while all of you try to get that mental image out of your heads)
(Bwa-ha-haaaa, you can't, can you??)
Hopefully he didn't notice.

Breaking News

Wednesday night my VCR broke.
Thursday night my washing machine broke.
Tonight I am afraid to do anything!
Heck, for all I know, my comput834bb ';.,.,,==,,d,3,,,2222222222

Memories Au Gratin

Many years ago, when I was in my early teens, there were these potato chips, called "O'Grady's."
They were extra-thick, and they came in a couple different flavors, but the one I remember best is "Au Gratin."
When you first opened the bag, this smell would be released in a pungent cloud around you-- like a potato chip bag fart-- replete with the scents of extremely aged cheddar and sour cream and who knows what else. It was enough to bring tears to your eyes.
And I mean that with all the love in my heart. My dad and I LOVED those chips. They may have stunk to high heaven (and all the heavens in between), but they were delicious. My mouth is watering just thinking about them.
They're no longer around these days, for some reason. I tried Googling them, to see what I could come up with. I couldn't find any pictures of the bag (though I remember it was kind of an aqua color), but I did find a blog entry from "Snooze Button Dreams", back in 2003, that tells a tale very similar to the situation in my own family. Click here to read it.
Instead of "Au Gratins", my dad referred to them as "Old Rottens". And it was a term of affection.
Ruffles makes a "Sour Cream and Cheddar" flavor which isn't bad, and is slightly reminiscent of the O'Grady's flavor, but not nearly as pungent-- and not nearly as thick and bold.
O'Grady's really were the best when it came to that kind of flavor.
Does anyone else remember these raunchy-smelling little gems?
I miss them.

Peculiar cravings

Today I had a craving...
You're gonna think it's weird but I'll tell you anyway.
I wanted the following scenario: Eating a big bowl of Corn Flakes while watching Goldfinger in my nightgown after cleaning the litter box.
(Janna pauses while all of you go "huh???")
So, on my way home today, I stopped at the store and bought a quart of milk and a box of Corn Flakes. (I also got a can of cat food for the kitties, as a special treat-- usually they only eat the dry kibble).
Now, here I am at home, in my nightgown, with a tummy full of Corn Flakes. The litter box is clean, and Goldfinger is playing in the background. (I have the TV and computer set up so I can easily watch both at the same time). The cats loved their can of food.
I anticipate a fun, cozy evening.
Cheers!

New Yankee Candle Scents

I got a Yankee Candle catalog in the mail. It has some 'scratch and sniff' pages in it, so people can sample the new scents.

Here are the ones I liked:
Midnight Cove
Island Spa
Lemon Lavender
Macintosh & Peach

Ones I didn't care one way or the other about:
Juicy Peach
Spring Bouquet
Good Morning
Eucalyptus
Peach & Sweet Berries

Ones I positively despised:
Willow Breeze
Meadow Blossoms
Vanilla Lime (smells like Play-Doh)

Sniff.... Sniff....

For those of you who perhaps sometimes suspect that I have waaaay too much time on my hands:
(1) Thank you for not saying it out loud. At least not where I can hear you. (Hey! I heard that!)
(2) You simply must check out this great post over at Cranky Old Bastard's blog. He and his friends smell-tested 56 different varieties of women's deodorant. The descriptions are hilarious, as well as a little disturbing. (Example: "Rotting grape jelly," "Cinnamon and ass," "Old Man," "Urine and rotted fruit, "Acetone and diapers"). Check it out and make sure your armpits smell the way they're supposed to. (For example, in my personal opinion, 'cinnamon and ass' should only be worn with a red outfit.)
Click here to read the post.

Weird Dream

I dreamed that our entire family owned a McDonald's together-- and my cousin & I were the only two people who could hear the ghost of Elvis inside it. All I heard from Elvis were low moans, but my cousin said she heard him frantically crying out for Martha Stewart. And while we were trying to investigate, the ghost of Elvis stole my wallet.

People to thank

1) Morgen, for providing that cute little raindrop icon!!
2) Bob Livingston (our band director) for helping me with my composition projects, especially the percussion parts.
3) Johnny Depp, for being Johnny Depp.
4) You, for reading my blog.

Things I will probably NOT do today

1) Rob a bank
2) Eat a crocodile
3) Stalk a celebrity
4) Sniff a dog's butt
5) Bake a cake from scratch
6) Make origami cranes out of cheeseburger wrappers

Compare and Contrast

Janna's Elusive Ideal

Seth Green
(Needs glasses, needs to be a little older)

David Caruso
(needs glasses, not nerdy enough)

Andy Dick
(not straight enough)

What can I say....

After having so much fun yesterday making my South Park self, I thought it would be great fun to create a perfect imaginary cartoon boyfriend for myself, putting together various components of what I think is cute/handsome/whatever.
(Repeat after me: "Janna, you're strange and you have waaaay too much time on your hands.")
So I started putting stuff together, Frankenstein-like, till I came up with this cute little guy:He's got red hair (I really have a thing for redheads), and he's just a little bit on the nerdy side (I have a soft spot for nerds). He's got a sweet disposition, like he kinda maybe knows he's a nerd and is willing to try just a bit harder to make up for it. :)
Then, I realized to my horror that this guy actually looks like a cross between Sherman and Carrot Top.
Now I'm very afraid!
It's like looking at a Rorschach Blot and realizing you see dead puppies. :)

But gosh darn it, don't we make a cute couple????
He could ride my "Wayback Machine" ANY day. :)

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Random Items For No Reason:
1) Stale potato chip
2) World Atlas from 1950
3) Triangular piece of pink velvet
4) Photo of Michael Keaton
5) T-shirt with mustard stain
6) Outdated phone book for Williams County, Ohio
7) Flashlight with no batteries
8) Poisonous mushroom
9) Antique sewing machine
10) Rabbit turd
11) Can of Campbell's Tomato Soup
12) Bottle of aspirin
13) Empty tupperware container

South Park Janna

I've been noticing that other people have South Park avatars of themselves on their blogs, so I decided to try making one for myself.
(apparently there are a few different sites out there that can help you do this... I used this one.)
Since I am a gal of many moods, I came up with three different South Park Jannas.
Here....
First of all, this is what I look like when I get up in the morning.
(And yet, surprisingly, I'm still single!)
Please stay away from the hatchet.

Next, this is me after I've had time to clean up and get dressed and make myself presentable enough to go out into public. It's as "dressed up" as I get, folks.
And then, last but not least, we have the more casual Janna, drinking Mountain Dew and 'letting my hair down', occasionally wondering if I'm on the right planet.... (Can you feel the excitement? Huh? Can ya?)
This was great fun, making these. I think eventually I may put one of them in my sidebar. (Which one should I put there?)
....And what do YOUR South Park selves look like?

ABC meme

Morgen tagged me for a meme, so here we go...

A- Available or single? Available.

B- Best Friend? I guess I am my own best friend. Not that I don't have other friends, I just try really hard to be my strongest ally.

C- Cake or Pie? Hmmm. Wellll, this depends.
(Warning: Dissertation follows)
I love blueberry pie and black raspberry pie, so those two choices would pretty much trump anything else. Other pie types are ok, but not necessarily scrumptious. Cheesecake (when it's done right) is incredibly delicious. (High quality, very dense, perfectly chilled, preferably with good dark chocolate included in there somewhere). On the other hand, I don't really care for plain white/yellow cake at all, nor do I like pound cake or coffee cake or carrot cake.
Sooooo, here are my priorities (in order of preference)
Extremely Yummy Things:
Blueberry/raspberry/black raspberry pie
New York dark chocolate cheesecake
Cherry cheesecake
Dense dark chocolate torte
"Don't Care One Way Or The Other" things:
Apple pie
Peach pie
Strawberry pie
"No Thanks, You Can Have Mine" things:
Coffee cake
Carrot cake
Coconut cream pie
Pecan pie
Mincemeat pie
Pound cake
Angel food cake
Pineapple upside down cake

D- Drink of Choice? Snapple Green Apple White Tea

E- Essential Item? I don't think I have an essential item... lemme think about that.

F- Favorite Color? It varies. Usually it's some kind of blue or green.

G- Gummi Bears or Worms? Gummi-anything is good, but since I hate the concept of worms, let's choose the bears.

H- Hometown? Jonesville, Michigan

I- Indulgence? Fountain pens

J- January or February? January!

K. Kids and names? 3 cats: Honeynut, Brynden, and Doyle.

L- Life is incomplete without? Music

M- Marriage Date? None! I'm single, singlesinglesingle!

N- Number of Siblings? Zero!

O- Oranges or apples? Apples

P- Phobias/Fears? Worms

Q- Favorite Quote? My favorite quote changes often, but today it's this:

"If they give you lined paper, write the other way."
-- William Carlos Williams

R- Reason to Smile? my cat Brynden

S- Season? Winter

T- Tag three people! No! :)
U- Unknown Fact About Me? As soon as I find out, I'll let you know.

V-Vegetable you hate? Onions!

W- Worst habit? Avoiding housework

X- X-Rays you’ve had? My foot, once, when it felt like a fork was poking me in the bottom of my foot. The x-rays didn't show anything, and we never did find out what was hurting me. It eventually went away, but I always wondered what the heck happened. Also when I was about 16, I had my neck x-rayed to see if it could explain why I get migraines so often. The x-rays revealed that my neck curves the wrong way, thus putting pressure on nerves and causing frequent migraines.

Y- Your favorite food? Tacos with plenty of hot sauce (and a side of rice) at El Chapaulin ("The Grasshopper") in Adrian, Michigan.

Z- Zodiac? Capricorn. (January 11th).

More Musical Ramblings

At band tonight, we rehearsed the new piece I wrote...
And I'm happy to say it went well!
There are still some nitpicky things I've gotta do, like re-transpose the treble clef euphonium/baritone part (somehow it didn't end up transposed right the first time).... and maybe double up the tenor sax part in a few places... but hey, overall, I'm satisfied. I think after a few good rehearsals, we can have this thing reasonably polished up. If I remember correctly, our next concert will be February 27th, which is just over a month away! Then we have another concert in May sometime. I don't know if this piece will be in the February concert or the May concert.
It's a scary thing, to hear a roomful of people sightreading music that you've written. All those people, playing these notes that previously only existed in your head (and on your computer. :)
Scary and exciting.
I'll keep you all posted on how things go.

If only I could pay my bills with this

Your Dominant Intelligence is Musical Intelligence

Every part of your life has a beat, and you're often tapping your fingers or toes. You enjoy sounds of all types, but you also find sound can distract you at the wrong time. You are probably a gifted musician of some sort - even if you haven't realized it. Also a music lover, you tend to appreciate artists of all kinds. You would make a great musician, disc jockey, singer, or composer.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

I'm thinking, I'm thinking....

(Note: Ok, I'm not gonna lie to ya, folks, it really really hurt my feelings that ZERO of my friends showed up on Friday. One or two missing might not have been a huge deal, but we're talking ZERO attendance from all the people I personally invited.
This came as a bit of a shock.
However, I'd like to try to move on to other topics, and maybe get my mind off the fact that the world sucks just a wee bit more than I previously thought.)
LIST OF TOPICS TO CONSIDER INSTEAD:
1) Look at the new banner and background I made! I was feeling "blue," so I went with a blue theme! I like it! I forgot how to wrangle it into the HTML, though, so for awhile there I was just about ready to scream. Nothing was working right. In fact, there are STILL some weird quirks I don't understand, like why each time I saved the template, it would delete something-- like a picture or a bit of HTML in the sidebar or the footer. Just *poof*, gone, deleted for no reason. It did that each time (it's never done that before today!!), and each time it deleted something different. Weird.
2) We had freezing rain last night (and today too), but so far have managed to retain our electricity here in Litchfield. Jonesville wasn't so lucky; at least 4000 people are without power there. (Including my mother!)
3) I would like to take this moment to announce that broccoli cheese quiche makes some really horrendous farts. You have been warned.
4) I tried the "Spicy Sweet Chili" Doritos! They're ok. They remind me of the barbecue flavoring that's on KC masterpiece potato chips. Definitely NOT Mexican flavored. Do not use these in nachos; I think it would be pretty gross. And of course they're not "hot" or "spicy", but I didn't expect them to be, either. They're just a sweet simple barbecue flavor.
5) While scooping the litter box, I am continually amazed at just how much poop can come out of three cats in such a short period of time.

Zero

Remember yesterday, when I was all excited and sappy and grateful that I had such wonderful friends who would drive such a long way just to attend my birthday party?
Forget all that... none of them showed up.
Bob the band director was there for awhile, with his wife and kid, so that was nice, at least.
The only other people there besides the host (Jason) was a very tiny smattering of Jason's friends.
Of all the friends I personally invited, zero showed up.

Friday ramblings

It's Friday!
For no reason whatsoever, here's a picture of Val Kilmer playing volleyball in Top Gun.
Tonight is the party at Jason's house. (the "day-after-my-birthday" party). I'm looking forward to it. Rumor has it, I might get to try Jello-shots for the very first time. Also, I've been craving shrimp scampi for about a year now (if not longer), and Jason plans on making some of that for me too. :)
Most of the attendees will be driving a very long way to get there. Some will be coming down from the Lansing area, others will be driving in from Adrian. If Morgen attends, he'll be driving in from Dowagiac. This is a long way to travel, just to celebrate someone's birthday, and I'm touched and honored that I have such good friends out there.
Next picture for no reason: Patrick Stewart.
It's raining right now, so I went to www.weather.com and checked out the forecast for this evening. Overnight, the rain is supposed to change over into snow, and the temperatures will drop to more of a January-like range. We've all been spoiled by such a mild winter, that the idea of actual "SNOW" seems like a big deal here. So dress warm and drink lots of hot chocolate, and remember it could be a lot worse. For example, we might live in Denver.
I feel bad for all those folks out in Colorado that really got hit with the snow these past few weeks. Can you imagine being buried in all that? I love winter, but that's just TOO much. If you live out there, my heart goes out to you. There's nothing I can do to help, so lemme just offer worthless advice instead: Wear clean underwear, drink plenty of fluids, and always remember, "I before E, except after C." (Feel free to give me credit, if this information ends up saving your life).
Next picture for no reason: Me, when I was a heckuva lot younger than I am now. I think this is maybe age four or five...? Before kindergarten, anyway.
One thing I bought at the store was the new "Sweet Chili" flavor of Doritos, so one of these days I'll blog about those. I don't expect them to be hot, but maybe they will have a nice sweet burst of spicy flavor. Or maybe they will taste like crap! Tune in later and find out!
Have a good weekend.
I'll blog later about the party.

Thirteen things I did on my birthday

1) Woke up (see, that's a good start)
2) Fed the cats.
3) Had lunch with Mom.
4) Picked up my free birthday pizza. (There's this place in Jonesville, called Main Street Pizza, which gives you a free individual-size pizza on your birthday). Yum!
5) Did some last-minute revisions on the music composition I'm printing out.
6) Gave myself a manicure and painted my nails in blue and white pinstripes. :)
7) Wore a blue shirt and blue pants and blue cardigan sweater (are you noticing a theme here?)
8) Gave a manicure to a sweet little old lady.
9) Checked e-mail and snail mail
10) Noticed that gas is 4 cents cheaper than yesterday (naturally, considering I filled the tank yesterday)
11) Petted the cats.... reminded self to scoop out litter box
12) Forgot to mail a letter I'd written... blamed it on age-related forgetfulness
13) Realized I'm only three years away from turning 40...!

Older than three dozen

It's after midnight... that means it's January 11th.
It's my birthday!
I'm 37 now; I think this means I should go hiding under the bedsheets with a bar of Ghiradelli chocolate and a Tony Bennett CD. (Or whatever music it is that I'm supposed to listen to in my golden years. :)
I know, I know; everyone's been telling me "Aw, 37 isn't that old." (Usually uttered by people who are older than 37)
I still want my Ghiradelli chocolate.
Happy January 11th, everybody!

Silly Meme

Morgen tagged me with a meme, so here we go:

1.When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
"I am NOT a morning person."

2.How much cash do you have on you?
About $24, I think. But that's gotta last me til the end of the month, so it's not much at all.

3.What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?
POOR (I agree with Morgen on this one!)

4.Do you label yourself?
Not sure what that means, so I guess not.

5.Bright or Dark Room?
Again I agree with Morgen: bright, except in case of migraine.

6.Why is there always a missing question?
A what? What missing question? How come I never know what anybody's talking about? Am I really getting that old? Am I? Huh? It's ok; you can tell me... I probably won't be able to hear you anyway.

7.What does your watch look like?
I don't wear a watch!
Sometimes I wish I did, though... like, for example, when I wanna know what time it is.....

8.What were you doing at midnight last night?
Apologizing to David Letterman because I was so tired I HAD to get some sleep. I turned off his show and went right to bed.

9.Where is your nearest 7-11?
These days, I have no idea. There used to be ones in Hillsdale and Adrian, but those are both long gone now. I wish we had some around here; I miss Slurpees.

10.What’s a word that you say a lot?
Surprisingly, I say 'groovy' a lot, even though I wasn't even around in the 1960's.

11.Who told you he/she loved you last?
My friend Steve, in a letter he wrote, which I received yesterday.

12.Last furry thing you touched?
Brynden!

13.How many rolls of film do you need developed?
I'm happy to say I've joined the 21st century and don't use those kinds of cameras anymore!

14.Favorite age you have been so far?
Nineteen.

15.Your worst enemy?
A former high-school friend who has gone totally whacko.

16.What is your current desktop picture?
A picture of my friend Lee, walking along the beach of Lake Michigan.

17.What was the last thing you said to someone?
"See you on Friday!"

18.The last song you listened to?
"A View To A Kill" by Duran Duran, from my soundtrack

19.What time of day were you born?
Huh... actually I don't remember. (I was really young then, and still wasn't wearing a watch. :)
I know it says on my birth certificate, but offhand I don't remember the time.

20.What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Say "What the hell?". (It doesn't work).

21.Do you consider yourself kind?
I guess so, sure....

22.What’s your life motto?
Life's too short to put up with crap.

23.Name three things you have on you at all times.
My two hematite rings and my glasses.

24.Can you change the oil on a car?
Ha! It's easy, you drive to this place that says "Quick Oil Change", and you tell the nice people to do it FOR you.

25.When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
About a week ago.

music update

Brief post to let you all know I'm still alive:
I spent twelve hours yesterday working on my band piece, (twelve!!!) and it STILL wasn't ready in time for the rehearsal. The "composition" part is over; it's just all the 'grunt' work of transferring the parts onto individual pages, and actually printing them out. (My printer is v-e-r-y ... s-l-o-w....). I got all the instrument parts printed out, but only three pages of the 17-page conductor's score.
This was a bummer because I really wanted to have it rehearsed last night.
Now I gotta wait til next week instead.
After rehearsal (which went well, we had other interesting stuff to play) and ABC group, I was exhausted. I went to bed at about midnight (didn't even stay up to watch all of Letterman!), and slept til about 8:00.
And here I am.

Attacked by the Music Monster

(Warning: if you weren't a music major in college, you might not have any idea what the hell I'm saying here. Feel free to keep reading anyway, though, if utter confusion sounds like a fun way to spend a few moments).

It's almost 4:00 in the morning and I've spent the whole night working on my band piece.
The pupils of my eyes have dilated into eighth-notes. I think the left one has a sharp next to it.)
And I'm still not satisfied with the instrumentation.
We rehearsed this a couple times, about two years ago, and I was NOT pleased with it. So displeased, in fact, that I put it away in my "maybe someday" folder... indefinitely. But I've taken it out and re-worked it, in hopes of giving it another try at our rehearsal on Tuesday. I've added some parts that weren't there before, and taken away some solos that were there before. I've added harmony where previously there was unison, and I've changed some harmonies that seemed to clash too much. I've switched parts and octaves and intervals and... well, let's just say I've spent a lot of time on this. And I really want it to work out this time.
Part of why it sounded so bad last time was that we didn't have a proper blend of instruments, and some were absent altogether. (for example, there's a nice important deep rumbly part I gave to bassoon, bass clarinet, and bari sax... but none of those people showed up except for bassoon. Bassoon all by itself is NOT loud or rumbly enough.) Plus, the dynamics were not played correctly, there were wrong notes and intonation problems and rhythm problems and tempo problems... I think we rehearsed it twice, and both times just about made me wince in agony.
The thing is, it sounded GREAT when I played it on the computer at home, with my composition software. The score was 'correct', as far as the notes went; I just wasn't happy with how it sounded in person. Maybe if we'd kept on rehearsing it, we could have nailed down the problems and 'fixed' stuff... but we didn't. And so it has sat in my folder for the past two years. Since then, we have performed other stuff I've written, so maybe the time has come for this particular piece as well.
So I'm hoping to have it all finished on Tuesday, with all the instrument parts printed out and ready to distribute at the rehearsal.
Hopefully we'll have a good group there, with all the instruments I need, and good musicians to play them.
That's not too much to ask....
Is it?...?

joke of the day

An old woman goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, you have to help me. I have terrible gas, but the good thing is that my farts are silent, and they don't stink. In fact, I have farted twice since I got here and you didn't even notice."
The doctor replied, "No problem; take these pills and come back in one week."
So one week goes by and the woman returns to the doctor and says, "Wow, I don't know what you did, but now my farts reek!!"
The doctor says, "Good; now that we cleared up your sinuses, let's work on that hearing."

Musical ramblings

Hello, Friday!
I'm still listening to my wonderful A View To A Kill soundtrack... and have memorized many of the brass sections.
This weekend I want to finish composing/editing my band piece, since our rehearsal is on Tuesday. This means I must eventually STOP listening to my new CD and actually write some music of my own.
I hope I don't get too depressed when I realize that my own music is not quite exactly as good as the professional movie soundtrack...!
One of my 'dream' jobs has always been to be a professional composer. I'd love to work on soundtracks for really cool movies, either sci-fi or James Bond or some weepy chick-flick. (Normally I'm not much for chick-flicks because I hate watching romance, but the music is usually decent, especially during the tragic moments when people die horrible deaths).
So that's what I'll be doing this weekend.
(Composing, not dying a horrible death.)
(I hope).

See? I get PLENTY of exercise...

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen pets it might be neat to have, if they could be shrunk down to a twelve-inch miniature:
1) Giraffe
2) Rhino
3) Polar Bear
4) Black Arabian stallion
5) Elephant
6) White tiger
7) Grizzly Bear
8) Timberwolf
9) Pterodactyl
10) Alligator
11) Holstein cow
12) Panda
13) I was going to say Black Panther, but then I realized I already have a miniature black panther in my home!

(P.S. What do you mean, pterodactyls don't exist anymore???)

Surprise present

Today I found a package in the mail.
I was puzzled, because I had no idea who it was from, and didn't recall ordering anything for myself. It was in a 9 x 6 padded envelope, and the contents felt flat and square, like a CD.
"Oooh," I thought. "Someone sent me a CD for my birthday! I wonder what it is! I wonder who it's from!"
The return address was from some company, so I figured the sender had placed an order online or through a snail-mail catalog.
Excitedly, I opened the package....
And laughed.
It was from someone who (I suppose) is my very best friend.... ME!
I'd totally forgotten about winning this auction on e-bay a couple weeks ago and buying this CD I really REALLY wanted. Forgot all about it! So when it arrived, it was kinda like receiving a surprise present from myself! (Hooray for memory loss; it creates embarrassing confusion nice surprises sometimes! Now what's my name again? Have we met?)

Oh, and in case you're wondering what the CD is.... it's the soundtrack to A View To A Kill. During my last visit with Morgen and Lee, we watched a few more Bond movies, one of which was this one. I quickly fell in love with the music. I LOVED the gorgeous instrumental arrangements. The background music in the beginning when he's skiing.... and later on when he's... well, pretty much through the whole thing. But especially there are some terrific french horn parts. I knew I simply HAD to find the soundtrack, so I could enjoy all this orchestral goodness in the privacy of my own home.
So I went on e-bay and found one... honestly I don't do a lot of e-bay these days, 'cause I really don't have money to spare, but in this case I made an exception.
And I'm glad I did!
I'm listening to the CD right now as I type this. I love it. The french horn parts are amazing, and I've gotten goose bumps more than once! I would LOVE to play these pieces in an orchestra.
My favorite tracks on the CD are:
(#1) Main Title (View To A Kill, performed by Duran Duran)
(#2) Snow Job
(#8) He's Dangerous
(#14) Golden Gate Fight
Except for the Duran Duran piece, all tracks are purely instrumental/orchestral. The composer is John Barry.
Gotta go; there are a few more goose bumps to enjoy. :)

And all this time, I thought they spoke English!

This is kind of a neat article; it talks about Australian words/expressions and how they originated.
It seems they have a whole other language down under-- things I've never even heard of. Before reading this article, I was pleased with myself for knowing "mate," "dingo," and "crikey," but now I'm convinced that if I ever actually traveled there, I would be utterly lost trying to figure out what the heck people were saying.

Here are some samples:
Dog's Eye = meat sandwich
Dinkum = genuine, true
Chunder in the dunny = Throw up in the toilet
Manchester = bed linen
Stoush with a larrikin = Fight with a troublemaker
Rorts = frauds, con tricks
Furphy = a rumor.

The article also says that Australia is changing its citizenship requirements; if you want to live there you will need to prove that you know the meanings to these unique words they use!

Another weird spy dream

Again I dreamed about being a spy last night.
I was investigating the murder of one of my fellow agents, whose nickname was "Two Fourths". Written down, the name looked like "2/4".
What the investigation revealed was that there were actually lots of agents named 2/4, and the assassin had killed the wrong one!

(I wonder what MY nickname was...)

Two double-oh-seven

I'm probably the last person on the planet to realize this, but 2007 should be a good year to watch Bond movies, 'cuz the last three digits are "007"!
No wonder I've been having lots of dreams about being a spy lately.

Aromatherapy for dogs

Roller coaster of excitement

It's just after midnight and I'm here marinating in my bathrobe in front of the computer, munching on garden herb Triscuits and drinking Snapple Green Apple White Tea. My hair is a mess and I haven't showered yet today. My feet are cold, I just realized that my bathrobe is wrong-side-out, one of the cats just knocked something over, and I just farted.
Hmmm..... So THIS is what 2007 is going to be like.

What? It's January already???

Wow. It's not December anymore.
This happens every year; I can sort of wrap my head around the fact that the year will be changing, but the MONTH-- that somehow hits me by surprise every time. I can't explain why. It's like the crossover from December to January feels like more of a "leap" than from 2006 to 2007.
I know, I'm weird.
I haven't even bought any 2007 calendars yet!
I wonder if there are calendars with fountain pens on them? There would be a new pen for each month... January could be Waterman, February could be Pelikan, March could be Aurora, ..... all the way to December, which would be Cartier.
January is also my birthday month. I was born in a "zero" year (1970), so the last digit of my age is the same as the last digit of the year. (e.g. after my birthday I'll be 37 in 2007... in 1986 I was 16... in 1975 I was 5....).
On New Years' Eve I had a scrumptious dinner of homemade French bread pizza, with pepperoni and Canadian bacon. Yum!!
It's currently 1:30 in the morning, which means it's still 2006 in Colorado and California and Hawaii. (All time zones west of Chicago). And... (gasp)... still DECEMBER there, too.